评论列表
  1. 无忧资讯 /
  2. 本地 /
  3. 华人移民2代坠网瘾深渊 父母悲恸崩溃 /
  4. 全部评论 /

华人移民2代坠网瘾深渊 父母悲恸崩溃

阅读全文
大家都说得很有道理
回复
我也有瘾,不过是看书上瘾,看书本不是坏事,问题是一定要看得头痛得不行,才肯去休息,对头脑造成伤害,需要花很多时间去休息。分析一下自己,看书的时候除了有求知欲驱动外,还有就是看书可以逃避现实,看呀看,就忘了现在的烦恼,另外现实有自己无法处理的方面,总想通过看书找到解决之道,于是看呀看,有时候有帮助,有时候一点用也没有,还是看呀看,希望能找到什么。即使知道这样不好,可是到了夜深人静的时候,一阵虚空恐惧袭来,又去看书。。。。 楼上的说得对,网瘾恐怕就是心情有问题,优秀的孩子不一定就是快乐的孩子。
回复
给他介绍女朋友
回复
正确引导是关键。
回复
别说小孩上瘾,大人照样会上瘾,小孩上瘾时间长了确实很头疼,会像一台电脑一样迅捷的思维(严格的说,是某种条件反射),却无法像个正常人类一样善于表达沟通,这两点直接造成了与父母之间的沟通障碍,对外界失去兴趣,漠不关心。网络上的很多小团体、亚文化,比如游戏圈、动漫圈文化,都是一般的父母难以理解的——生活在两个世界的人是不可能有共同语言的。教育孩子,在于“交心”,没有共同语言,心怎么交?
回复
网络就是毒品,千万不要让孩子接触!🤨
回复
怎么办!怎么办?怎么办?救救孩子!
回复
呱呱随笔:孩子啊,我该怎么教育你? 朋友”睡熊猫“写了一篇”孩子,我们该怎样来爱你?“的博文,在加国无忧网教育栏目发表,引起了热列的讨论。朋友的文章是关于如何关心爱护在加国的小留学生的。这是一个非常好的提议。其实我们移民自己的孩子也是非常需要教育引导的。我在工作过程中接触到一些移民父母,他们的小孩存在着一些不好的习惯,并且很严重.比如:抽烟,打游戏,爱好买名牌东东。这些不好的习惯严重影响了小孩的学业,身体及前途;同时也导致了父母小孩之间的紧张关系。我经常与他们探讨如何教育小孩,也一直在思考这个问题,现特地把我的独特方法写出来与大家分享。总的来说,就是要“三心二用一点”。 1.三心。教育小孩要有爱心,恒心,信心。 圣经名言:爱是恒久忍耐,又有恩慈。爱心中如果夹杂了私心,教育小孩的效果就会打折扣.有的父母对小孩好一点,就希望小孩有回馈,否则就冲小孩发脾气,说“我白养你了”,“白疼你了”等等;或者只有小孩取得了好成绩,才奖励小孩,好像是做交易似的。小孩子就象小树苗,需要浇水,施肥,修剪才能长成参天大树,这是一个长期过程,所以要有恒心。教育培养小孩,信心也很重要. 当今社会,各种诱惑及错误思潮令小孩眼花缭乱,小孩子的判断能力及识别能力有限.小孩子沾上坏习惯是很容易的.另一方面,由于现在的小孩子个性都很强,小孩子有了坏习惯后,父母要其改变很难.这是一个争战的过程.如果父母对矫正小孩失去信心,那小孩就会越滑越远.再者,小孩与父母是有血缘关系的,不可能割断的,如果你在小孩的关键成长时间没有付出心血,那今后是会烦恼一辈子的。我碰到很多父母在矫正小孩这方面失去了信心,在这里我要大声疾呼,孩子是最宝贵的,要鼓足信心啊,善养你的孩子. 2.二用。一用你的智慧;二用你的言行。 教育小孩光靠干巴巴的几句话是不行的,常说的就是:“不好好学习,将来没有出息”等。我呢,就是用“追风”理论来说服小孩。比如:你玩游戏吧,只会有暂时的快乐,身体不好还承受不了那个紧张,刺激。过后后遗症可不少:兴奋,影响学习,晚上也睡不好觉,影响身体健康。抽烟吧,也是一样,那肯定影响健康。爱好名牌东东吧,那更是没有底,潮流天天变。重要的是要透过现象看本质。抽烟吧,说明他有烦恼,或者结交了不好的朋友;爱好名牌东东吧,也许他周围的一帮朋友都爱攀比炫耀。怎么办?一是要培养他的其他兴趣爱好,比如:运动,那不是追风,是会受益一辈子的。二是想办法让他结交好朋友,带他去串门,与大一点的好榜样交流,到教会去也是一条出路.三是帮他找做义工的机会,让他开阔眼界,多认识社会,了解生活的艰辛.真实社会与网络游戏中的虚拟社区还是有很大差别的. 教育小孩还要靠言行。如果你自己就天天泡在网上,那要小孩不玩游戏就很难。如果小孩完全不听话,金玉良言都听不进去,那用独招,也是“毒招”:与他同行。也玩游戏,也抽烟。如果你也沉进去了,那就不要教育小孩了。与他同行,是要亲身体会这些行为的坏处,找到这些不良习惯的特点,也容易找到克服这些不好的毛病的办法;同时也能拉近与小孩的距离,容易与小孩沟通,便于探讨如何克服这些坏毛病,坏习惯。 3.最重要的一点:就是要付出时间在小孩子身上, 加上上面的招数来建立良好的亲子关系。有了好的关系,你的说服教育就会有效果。如果我们移民把大把的时间用于加班加点赚钱,为买房子,尽快还房贷拼命,可能会得不偿失. 父母亲子行为举例: 早晨小孩赖床不起(不赖床也可以采取此行动),可以来到他床前,为他做眼保健操,摸他的头,摸他的脸,按摩他的手.这一招小孩子很受用,因为他们的压力也是很大的,也很辛苦.小孩子心情好,就可以慢慢地与他交流.如果小孩子反感你的亲密行为,不要放弃,循序渐进,慢慢会有效果的.此法已经过实践检验,有效. 最后声明:毒招如果有负作用,本人不负责任。
回复
Alternative Hypotheses In addition to those previously discussed, here is an alternative hypothesis that no research to date has seriously considered -- that the behaviors we are observing are phasic. That is, for most people with "Internet addiction," they are likely newcomers to the Internet. They are going through the first stage of acclimating themselves to a new environment -- by fully immersing themselves in it. Since this environment is so much larger than anything we've ever seen before, some people get "stuck" in the acclimation ( or enchantment) stage for a longer period of time than is typical for acclimating to new technologies, products, or services. Walther (1999) made a similar observation based upon the work of Roberts, Smith, and Pollack (1996). The Roberts et al. study found that online chat activity was phasic -- people first were enchanted by the activity (characterized by some as obsession), followed by disillusionment with chatting and a decline in usage, and then a balance was reached where the level of chat activity normalized. I hypothesize that this type of model can be more globally applied to online usage in general: Some people simply get caught in Stage I and never move beyond it. They may need some help to get to Stage III.For existing online users, my model allows for overuse as well, since the overuse is defined by finding a new online activity. I would argue, though, that existing users have a much more easier time successfully navigating through these stages for new activities they find online than newcomers to the Internet. It is possible, however, for an existing user to find a new activity (such as an attractive chat room or newsgroup or Website) that could lead them back into this model. Note one important distinction about my model... It makes the assumption that since all online activity is phasic to some degree, all people will eventually get to Stage III on their own. Just like a teenager learns to not spend hours on the telephone every night on their own (eventually!), most adults online will also learn how to responsibly integrate the Internet into their lives. For some, this integration simply takes longer than others. What Do I Do If I Think I Have It?First, don't panic. Second, just because there is a debate about the validity of this diagnostic category amongst professionals doesn't mean there isn't help for it. In fact, as I mentioned earlier, help is readily available for this problem without needing to create all this hoopla about a new diagnosis. If you have a life problem, or are grappling with a disorder such as depression, seek professional treatment for it. Once you admit and address the problem, other pieces of your life will fall back into place. Psychologists have studied compulsive behaviors and their treatments for years now, and nearly any well-trained mental health professional will be able to help you learn to slowly curve the time spent online, and address the problems or concerns in your life that may have contributed to your online overuse, or were caused by it. No need for a specialist or an online support group.
回复
Where Did It Come From? Good question. It came from, believe it or not, the criteria for pathological gambling, a single, anti-social behavior that has very little social redeeming value. Researchers in this area believe they can simply copy this criteria and apply it to the hundreds of behaviors carried out everyday on the Internet, a largely pro-social, interactive, and information-driven medium. Do these two dissimilar areas have much in common beyond their face value? I don't see it.I don't know of any other disorder currently being researched where the researchers, showing all the originality of a trash romance novel writer, simply "borrowed" the diagnostic symptom criteria for an unrelated disorder, made a few changes, and declared the existence of a new disorder. If this sounds absurd, it's because it is.And this speaks to the larger problem these researchers grapple with... Most have no theory driving their assumptions (see Walther, 1999 for a further discussion of this issue). They see a client in pain (and in fact, I've sat in many presentations by these clinicians where they start it off with just such an example), and figure, "Hey, the Internet caused this pain. I'm going to go out and study what makes this possible on the Internet." There's no theory (well, sometimes there's theory after-the-fact), and while some quasi-theoretical explanations are slowly emerging, it is putting the chicken far before the egg.Do You Spend Too Much Time Online?In relation to what or whom? Time alone cannot be an indicator of being addicted or engaging in compulsive behavior. Time must be taken in context with other factors, such as whether you're a college student (who, as a whole, proportionally spend a greater amount of time online), whether it's a part of your job, whether you have any pre-existing conditions (such as another mental disorder; a person with depression is more likely to spend more time online than someone who doesn't, for instance, often in a virtual support group environment), whether you have problems or issues in your life which may be causing you to spend more time online (e.g., using it to "get away" from life's problems, a bad marriage, difficult social relations), etc. So talking about whether you spend too muchtime online without this important context is useless.What Makes the Internet So Addictive?Well, as I have shown above, the research is exploratory at this time, so suppositions such as what makes the Internet so "addictive" are no better than guesses. Since other researchers online have made their guesses known, here are mine.Since the aspects of the Internet where people are spending the greatest amount of time online have to do with social interactions, it would appear that socialization is what makes the Internet so "addicting." That's right -- plain old hanging out with other people and talking with them. Whether it's via e-mail, a discussion forum, chat, or a game online (such as a MUD), people are spending this time exchanging information, support, and chit-chat with other people like themselves. Would we ever characterize any time spent in the real world with friends as "addicting?" Of course not. Teenagers talk on the phone for hours on end, with people they see everyday! Do we say they are addicted to the telephone? Of course not. People lose hours at a time, immersed in a book, ignoring friends and family, and often not even picking up the phone when it rings. Do we say they are addicted to the book? Of course not. If some clinicians and researchers are now going to start defining addiction as social interactions, then every real-world social relationship I have is an addictive one. Socializing -- talking -- is a very "addictive" behavior, if one applies the same criteria to it as researchers looking at Internet addiction do. Does the fact that we're now socializing with the help of some technology (can you say, "telephone"?) change the basic process of socialization? Perhaps, a bit. But not so significantly as to warrant a disorder. Checking e-mail, as Greenfield claims, is not the same as pulling a slot-machine's handle. One is social seeking behavior, the other is reward seeking behavior. They are two very different things, as any behaviorist will tell you. It's too bad the researchers can't make this differentiation, because it shows a significant lack of understanding of basic behavioral theory.
回复
Why Does the Research Leave Something to Be Desired?Well, the obvious answer is that many of the original researchers into the phenomenon known as IAD were actually clinicians who decided to conduct a survey. Usually doctoral training is sufficient to create and test a survey, yet the psychometric properties of these surveys are never released. (Perhaps because they were never conducted in the first place? We simply do not know.) The obvious confounds are never controlled for in most of these surveys. Questions about pre-existing or a history of mental disorders (e.g., depression, anxiety), health problems or disabilities, or relationship problems are absent from these surveys. Since this is one of the most obvious alternative explanations for some of the data being obtained (for example, see Storm King's article, Is the Internet Addictive, or Are Addicts Using the Internet? below), it is very surprising these questions are left off. It taints all the data and make the data virtually useless. Other factors are simply not controlled for. The current Internet population is nearly 50/50 in terms of proportion of men to women. Yet people are still drawing conclusions about this same group of people based upon survey samples that have 70-80% men, comprised mostly of white Americans. Researchers barely mention these discrepancies, all of which will again skew the results. Research done in a particular area should also agree about certain very basic things after a time. Years have gone by and there are more than a few studies out there looking at Internet addiction. Yet none of them agree on a single definition for this problem, and all of them vary widely in their reported results of how much time an "addict" spends online. If they can't even get these basics down, it is not surprising the research quality still suffers. More research has been done since the original surveys were released in 1996. This newer research has been conducted by more independent researchers with clearer hypotheses and stronger, less biased population sets. More about these studies will be discussed in updates to this article.
回复
Internet Addiction GuideBy John M. Grohol, Psy.D. January 5, 2012 A resource for objective, useful information about Internet addiction, a theorized disorder. Is the Internet Addiction Test valid? What is Internet Addiction Disorder (IAD)? What "Internet addiction disorder" (IAD) is still difficult to define at this time. Much of the original research was based upon the weakest type of research methodology, namely exploratory surveys with no clear hypothesis or rationale backing them. Coming from an atheoretical approach has some benefits, but also is not typically recognized as being a strong way to approach a new disorder. More recent research has expanded upon the original surveys and anecdotal case study reports. However, as I will illustrate below later, even these studies don't support the conclusions the authors claim. The original research into this disorder began with exploratory surveys, which cannot establish causal relationships between specific behaviors and their cause. While surveys can help establish descriptions of how people feel about themselves and their behaviors, they cannot draw conclusions about whether a specific technology, such as the Internet, has actually caused those behaviors. Those conclusions that are drawn are purely speculative and subjective made by the researchers themselves. Researchers have a name for this logical fallacy, ignoring a common cause. It's one of the oldest fallacies in science, and one still regularly perpetrated in psychological research today. Do some people have problems with spending too much time online? Sure they do. Some people also spend too much time reading, watching television, and working, and ignore family, friendships, and social activities. But do we have TV addiction disorder, book addiction, and work addictionbeing suggested as legitimate mental disorders in the same category as schizophrenia and depression? I think not. It's the tendency of some mental health professionals and researchers to want to label everything they see as potentially harmful with a new diagnostic category. Unfortunately, this causes more harm than it helps people. (The road to "discovering" IAD is filled with many logical fallacies, not the least of which is the confusion between cause and effect.) What most people online who think they are addicted are probably suffering from is the desire to not want to deal with other problems in their lives. Those problems may be a mental disorder (depression, anxiety, etc.), a serious health problem or disability, or a relationship problem. It is no different than turning on the TV so you won't have to talk to your spouse, or going "out with the boys" for a few drinks so you don't have to spend time at home. Nothing is different except the modality.What some very few people who spend time online without any other problems present may suffer from is compulsiveover-use. Compulsive behaviors, however, are already covered by existing diagnostic categories and treatment would be similar. It's not the technology (whether it be the Internet, a book, the telephone, or the television) that is important or addicting -- it's the behavior. And behaviors are easily treatable by traditional cognitive-behavior techniques in psychotherapy.Case studies, the alternative to surveys used for many conclusions drawn about online overuse, are just as problematic. How can we really draw any reasonable conclusions about millions of people online based upon one or two case studies? Yet media stories, and some researchers, covering this issue usually use a case study to help "illustrate" the problem. All a case study does is influence our emotional reactions to the issue; it does nothing to help us further understand the actual problem and the many potential explanations for it. Case studies on an issue like this are usually a red flag that help frame the issue in an emotional light, leaving hard, scientific data out of the picture. It is a common diversionary tactic. There is more research that needs to be critically examined here, which I will provide descriptive analyses of shortly.
回复
不能理解网瘾病,所有的孩子及大人都玩游戏,不都很正常吗. 他应该是先出现精神方面的问题,而后陷入游戏中不能自控. 他父母的教育方法有问题,一个孩子优秀不等于他快乐. 很想知道他现在是否获得对症的治疗.
回复
,普通人智商在70多no chinese average iq is about 110无 忧 网 - 51
回复
智商140以上者称为天才,智商120-140为最优秀,100、110、120为优秀,90-100为常才,80-90为次正常,70-80为临界正常,60-70为轻度智力落后,50-60为愚鲁,20-25为痴鲁,25以下为白痴。不过别迷信这些
回复
x
x